Jingjok
แล้วแต่: the art of not choosing
láeo-dtàae
Ask a Thai friend where they'd like to eat and you will often hear แล้วแต่ 'up to you' or อะไรก็ได้ 'anything'. It isn't indifference: letting the other person choose is a form of politeness and of เกรงใจ (not wanting to impose). It can still be frustrating when nobody decides. The trick is to offer two concrete options: 'ส้มตำหรือก๋วยเตี๋ยว?' Most people will happily pick one. Be aware that แล้วแต่ can also be a quiet signal of reluctance, especially if it's said flatly. Watch the face and the tone as well as the words.
Try this today
Next time someone says แล้วแต่, offer two choices and let them pick.
Learn this in “Opinions and discussion” →
Your first 90 days of Thai
Culture cards in Jingjok are tied to the words that carry them, each ending in one thing to try today.
- WEEKS 1–2 · SURVIVEGreet anyone, pay, and order food and 7-Eleven exactly how you like it.
- WEEKS 3–6 · SETTLE INGet around by taxi, Grab and skytrain, find anything, and handle your landlord.
- WEEKS 7–12 · RUN YOUR LIFEPharmacy, bank, SIM and apps, how you feel, and a weekend away, all in Thai.
The first week is free.